(no subject)

I just coughed.

While drinking water.

Which caused the water to leave my mouth at a high rate of speed.

Which caused an arc of water about four feet long to spread from my mouth, across my desk, to splatter the teacher sitting across from me.

Which caused me to try to apologize, which caused the remaining water to go down into my lungs, which caused a couple minutes of choking and gagging.

I fail. I fail at life.