Jackass of the Day

[oakenguy]

Hey, preraphaelite, this one might be coming to a courtroom near you soon!

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20080208150740AAO03ZJ

In summary: A Boston shoplifter gets caught, signed a form agreeing to pay restitution and penalties, is then outraged to find the penalty is $150, and goes to an online advice column wanting to know if he should sue the chain. Wackiness, as they say, ensues.

Yes. GOD yes, take it to court. Contact the media, too. Paris Hilton's been oddly quiet and Britney's just sad...America needs someone new to laugh at.

So, how'm I doing?

Well, lemme tell you.

So this delivery guy comes in with a HUGE vase of flowers, totally lost--he's read the room number as the street address and is at the other end of campus from where he's supposed to be. I see who it's for (and yay, it's someone I really like!) and gently point out that he read the address backwards and he needs to be three blocks away from where he actually is. He looks miserable. SO miserable that I, remembering that I have an errand in the bookstore and have to be down that way anyhow, offer to drop them off for him.

Stupid, stupid, STUPID.

He says yes! He leaves! I get my coat, I pick up the flowers.

The vase weighs *40 pounds*!

No problem, though, I'm on my way. I make it about ten feet out the door and I'm stopped by a teacher who's on her way to see me because she, coincidentally, *needs* the book I'm heading to the bookstore for. I
explain my plan, which is to drop the flowers off and then get the books on the way back to the office, and she's like, "Erk, I need the book for my class that starts in ten minutes!"

Sigh.

So I carry the flowers into the bookstore. Buy the books. Loan her one book. Heft the flowers *and the other books*, plod the rest of the way. Go up to the 4th floor. Put my flowers down. Ask for Juliana. Wait.
Wait. Wait...

...because it turns out the address on the flowers is WRONG. Because her office MOVED.

Because she now WORKS IN MY BUILDING, TWO FLOORS ABOVE MY DESK.

That's how I'm doing.

Comments

she now WORKS IN MY BUILDING

[lilacsinmarch.livejournal.com]

Oh dear, this is most unfortunate *stifles her laughter*.

[malinaldarose.livejournal.com]

Those are the kinds of days where the only thing to do is go home, go to bed and pull the blankies over your head hoping that the whole thing was only one of those anxiety nightmares.

[superrob.livejournal.com]

As usual, you have made me laugh out loud.

[hermitgeecko.livejournal.com]

But you still got to drop off flowers for her. This is not so bad. Right?

[flopart.livejournal.com]

But I louuurve j00000.

[jeninmaine.livejournal.com]

No good deed goes unpunished, as they say!

[ursula-lear.livejournal.com]

This is why the Chinese make you responsible for the life you change. Or was the saying actually for the life you save? Either way . . . *weg*

[rantarn.livejournal.com]

Some days it just doesn't pay to chew through the leather straps.

[braingeyser.livejournal.com]

Hey, some of us pay $15 per class for a workout like that! Yours was free, and came with karma points!
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